Peace and restoration...

Not gifts. Not traditions. Not lights, trees, Santa, or wreaths. Not even family or heartwarming acts of kindness. While all good things, and expected of all of us, they are not the reason that the holiday season is celebrated. Me may have put too much emphasis on these things, but we should reflect on what happened in a small Jewish village over 2000 years ago. A child was born to a Jewish carpenter and his new wife, although the circumstances around it were not ideal. You see, Joseph was a man of upstanding character and had a lot to lose. His promised wife had, surely to the people around them, unexpectedly and suspiciously became pregnant. Despite sure pressure from others, he trusted his wife and the Lord with the news he was given. They were chosen to be the earthly parents of the God-child. They were chosen to raise Jesus. Can you imagine? The responsibility of rearing the human form of God Almighty. Now we all know the story. The shepherds, the star, wise men, and angry king, a stable, and so on. It is the centerpiece of what we call Christmas. But even if we stop and remember this story this weekend, and don't capture the entire essence of what happened, what a tragedy that would be. Yes, we remember the fact that he became flesh and bone. We reflect on the fact that he was born in terrible conditions, and humbled Himself to be delivered in a barn. We even look ahead to Calvary, and the mission of His life, to die on the cross for our sins. But it is so much more than that. I am not saying that anything I have said is not good news, but I am saying that we sometimes get caught up with the details, and miss the overall mission of what actually happened in Bethlehem. God the Father, sent his Son, Jesus Christ, as an anthropomorphic representation of Himself to, yes, save us, but on a grander scale, to bring peace and restored hope for creation. This is a major theological handicap if we miss this. God didn't just want to save us from eternal damnation. While this is a definite plus, He more importantly wanted to restore us and our relationship to Him. He sent Christ into the world to save humanity, to bring peace, to restore His creation by conquering our sin for us. Before Jesus Christ, God was sovereign, but not personal. Intercessory, sacrifices, temples, and rigid laws separated the hearts of man from the Holy of Holies. God desired the fellowship with man, but could not compromise His holy and righteous character to do so without the law and priests. This is why we celebrate the Christ. We celebrate to hope we have in Him. We celebrate to peace we find in His propitiation. We celebrate the restoration of our relationship with the Holy Creator provided by His birth, His life, His death, and His resurrection. This is why Christmas services are so special. This is why we celebrate. This is why we give up our valuable time this season. This is why my family is attending the Christmas Eve service at Hickory Grove tomorrow night. He wants to bring us peace, and He wants to restore us to Him. May He bring peace into your heart this Christmas, and may you accept the greatest gift ever given...restoration in Him.    -Trey

Holiday update

   Recently I have blogged about many things including, memories, spiritual journeys, and even poetry, and although I enjoy writing them, and sharing what is in my heart, I sometimes feel that what is happening within our family, and updates on events and our journey are sometimes overlooked. That being said, I wanted to write this and just capture a snapshot of our past few months as a family, and let everyone know how we are doing.

   Over the past few months we have been busy getting the house in order. With the move back from TN in our rear view, things are starting to settle in and we are adjusting to our new schedules, new roles within our jobs, and new experiences with Tucker. It does feel as if we will be unpacking forever, and although most things are up and in place, we are constantly finding things to unpack and put up. One of the things that contributed to this was the holidays. Just when we thought we were on top of things, it was time to redecorate, and find our Christmas decor. It has been fun though. Julie pretty much handled 99 percent of the decorating, and I ran a few strings of lights outdoors last night. all in all, we love the place, and are so proud of what God has blessed us with here. There are a few more things to do, such as stripping wallpaper in the half bath, and some paint touch-ups, but we cannot complain about where we are in this place.

   Julie and I both are thrilled about our jobs, and the opportunity that we had to transition so seamlessly into them here after a move is nothing short of heaven-sent. Julie is working at Presbyterian-Matthews on the 4th floor. I think is is called med-surge? I keep hearing that, and don't really know what she does, except being an RN. Sometimes the long hours wears on her, and being away from Tucker is not the best, but she is doing what she loves to do. I am still working in sales Ferguson Enterprises- HVAC division. I was given a transfer back to the main branch that I started at, and love the opportunities that lie ahead with my career there. Over the past three years, I worked at a blended branch: HVAC, plumbing, and waterworks. While it was an incredible learning experience, and my product knowledge increased greatly, it is so nice to be back in one market again. I look forward to what is on the horizon at Ferguson.

   Tucker is growing up way too fast. We moved back right before his first birthday, and that seems so long ago. He is running around this house like a crazy man, and seems to learn new words every day. He looks more and more like his Momma every time I see him. He loves hanging out with all of his family, and those everyday moments just solidify why we belong here. Even though we have had a couple of medical scares with him, we thank God everyday for his health and his spirit. We enrolled him at Hickory Grove day care, and love the chance he gets to interact with his friends each day. Between weekdays, and seeing them on Sundays as well, we are proud to see his development in his mobility, his motor skills, and how he plays with others. We cannot wait to see what the new year brings, and the many blessings ahead for our him and our family.

   We are so blessed to have a church family that we love, and a church that is strengthening us as individuals, and as a family. We are back at Hickory Grove (main campus), and love what God is showing us through His body. HG will always hold a special place in mine and Julie's life, as it is the place where we met, and were married. It is so good to worship with family and friends again, and build those relationships back that we had lost for so many years. Through the discipline of tithing faithfully, and the excitement of working with the college ministry students, the Lord has been so good to us, and showing us dependence and joy in Him. It is exciting to not only see our journey at Hickory Grove, but also all the other family members develop. Specifically, I am so proud of my sister and brother in law, Megan and Steven, as well as my brother Tanner so involved with Elevation, and the kids ministry there. I, to be honest, have never been to their church, but their pastor's book, "Sun Stand Still," is honestly one of the biggest catalysts in the process to get us back to NC. It is so encouraging to see their passion for Christ, and although we don't attend the same church, I am behind them fully. It is my prayer that this next year, I will see all my extended family faithfully in a church family somewhere. And not just attending, but fully committed to Christ, and His plans for them. It is above all things, what I pray for the most, and what is dearest to my heart.

   Another big thing lately has been the addition of our dogs' newest litter of puppies. This was Biscuit's and Grits' second litter, and we had 4 (one runt we had to put down). We had one male chocolate, one black male, and one yellow female.  Just this week we sold the last one (female) to a great family, and things can get back to normal. We loved the time we had with them, but we know that they are going to have great life with the families they went to.

   There has been many other events that have shaped the past few months for us, but maybe I will catch you guys up in later blogs about them. For the most part, this has been a broad snapshot of our journey to where we are today, and a quick update of how things are going in the Long family. We hope you and yours have a wonderful holiday season, and a merry Christmas!

                                                                                                                           -Trey

sentimental mood...

     Tonight, as I sit here in my living room, listening to classic Christmas standards, reading, and, of course, cup of coffee in hand, I just slipped into a sentimental mood. This holiday season is carrying a lot more emotional weight to it than I have ever experienced before. I think many factors are attributing to this, and I thought I would pause a bit and reflect on those thoughts. And being the subject matter as it is, and the time of year it is, I thought I would share it in written form. I don't know if it is necessarily to document my experiences for you to read, but maybe it will get you to reflect on some things from your past, and even present, and cause you to pause for awhile. Maybe smile thinking about blessings in your life right now. Maybe cry a little as you remember those memories and lives from the past that have impacted your current holiday traditions. Maybe appreciate the small things in life that get overlooked so many times. I don't know your situation, but here some thoughts, memories, and reflections on what makes this time of the year so special to me...

-Family: I have to say, I was guilty of taking for granted the gift of family. Three years ago, Julie and I decided that we would move to TN, and we were so fortunate to grow as a couple, as a family with the addition of Tucker, and as individuals with the many career and personal experiences that the Lord had us go through. I still do not know the full picture behind why the Lord opened doors for us to move out there like He did, but I do know this, one of the biggest lessons He taught us while we were there was to never take for granted family, and the times together. It wasn't the big events that we missed, as we travelled back for most of the major things, but it was the small everyday things that we missed the most. I treasure the smallest of events now, from late night coffee at my parents house, to bonfires at my uncles house, to family Christmas get-togethers, to walking with my Grandpa in his garden, to disc golf and playing music with my brother, to helping my family build my sister's shed. I was picking up drive through fast food the other night, and I happened to see my grandparents car parked, and they were eating inside. I had a lot to do that night, and was very tired after a long day, but I thought about the many times I prayed for those opportunities to spend with them while I has in TN, and I parked the car and went in to talk to them. You don't get those chances back. I cherish every moment now, and I know I do not always show it, or tell others enough, but when I lay my head down every night, I thank God for every moment He gives me with those people I love the most. I know that this month will be crazy and hectic, but this year I have a new appreciation for the time I have with my family, and no matter what has happened, been said, or done throughout the year, I am truly looking forward to seeing each and every one of them. I love every one of them.

-Tucker: My little man is growing up so fast. This is technically his second Christmas, but this one will be so special for Julie and I. We love seeing things through his big green eyes now. Everything is so fresh, new, and special. He truly is a blessing, and God has been so good to us. From his dancing around the living room to the music, to the sparkle of the tree lights in his eyes, to the enjoyment we get in seeing him experience the holidays with all his family, Christmastime is different now.

-Julie: As excited as I am for Tucker this year, I think that I am more excited for my wife. I will say, that she has been so good to me, and has given up a lot in recent years in her support for me. As we were looking for houses before the move back, I was really hoping and praying that she would finally get a house that she could really make a home for us to experience life together. God blessed us with this home we are in, and she has put a lot of hard work and creativity into the decorations and such. I am glad she finally has a place she is proud of, and that she can put her signature on. I am so glad that she is back home to experience this year with her immediate family. She cherishes those moments with her mom and sisters baking cookies, wrapping gifts, and shopping. With all she has done for us, she deserves to be happy and enjoy the holidays. She is Mrs. Christmas, and the place is beautiful. I love her for making this home a special place we can relax and celebrate. You deserve it honey...

-Memories: I am thankful for all the great memories that I have been fortunate to be a part over the years. This is such a rich time to experience and appreciate those things that have been given to us. I think of Christmas day at Grandpa Collins house every time I smell a wood burning stove in the air. I miss the little things such as Grandma Long's gumball tree, and getting fruit bags at church. (I still love those things!...pecans, gum, oranges, apples, 3 musketeers, etc) I think of all the wonderful times we had at extended family get-togethers, and catching up with those we don't get to see but a few times a year. I think of all those years of waking up to the smell of ham biscuits for Christmas breakfast, and riding to McAddenville for the lights. I remember that Christmas just wasn't right with two albums: Carpenters Christmas, and Ronnie Milsap/Alabama Christmas. I still to this day enjoy those albums the best. I remember all those days and nights working on cantata music with Mom and Dad, and miss those days of playing and singing music with them. I miss the smile on Grandma Long's face seeing everyone crammed into that house. She loved everyone, and despite everything, always delighted in having gifts for everyone. At the time, I did not appreciate what she gave me enough, compared to other things I received from others, but looking back, they were the most precious things I was given. She gave us all she had. I wish Tucker could have met her, she would have loved him. I am thankful for my parents and the love and sacrifice they showed us every Christmas. They always gave us way more than what we deserved, and they wanted to make this time of year special for us. From sitting around the table listening to music, to treasure hunts, to holiday movies, this was always a magical time for our family. I can only hope I can provide for Tucker what they have sacrificed for me.

-The little things: This year, I am slowing down and enjoying things a little more. I am going enjoy good coffee, or even some spiced cider. I am starting to enjoy the Christmas classics a little more, and not get as annoyed with Christmas music so fast. We are going to not run around as much this month, but instead invest in the home God has given us, and the time with Tucker here. We will enjoy and appreciate the decorations, and reflect on the joy and celebration they represent. We will try to savor every moment that is spent with family and friends, and not take for granted those relationships. Try to enjoy a good Christmas event, whether it be a parade, cantata, concert, or other performance. Julie and I have done several things, including Operation Christmas Child, and the Angel Tree this year. I say this not to boast in anything, or to point out anything from pride, but to say that we are so happy to give to others that need help, and encourage you to do so as well. This has probably been the most convicting part of the holidays for me, as I have realized how selfish and self-centered I have been over the past few years. People are hurting out there, and this time of year, we have such an opportunity to show the love of Christ to others by providing for needs and wants that they have. Especially kids. I cannot stand the thought of orphans, or needy kids and families, thinking that they have no hope or that no one cares. If we can bring a smile to a few kids faces this year, then that is what we will do. It really has set the tone for our holiday season. I wish we could do more.

-Christ: He is so deserving of our worship and reflection all year long, but especially during the holidays. Whatever I, my family, or you do this year, I hope we always find time to stop and be thankful to Him for wrapping our sinful flesh around his holiness, taking the form of a man, and coming to earth to restore the relationship with humanity. It is the greatest story ever told, and so humbling to think about. Embrace His gift to us this year, and pass it along to others. May He not get lost in all of the shuffle this year. May it not be said of us as it says in Joel 2:17: "Spare your people, O LORD, and make not your heritage a reproach, a byword among the nations. Why should they say among the peoples, 'Where is their God?'" His gift to us was a heritage and adoption into His family, made possible by His sacrifice on the cross for our sins. May we not be asked where our God is this Christmas. It's okay to regift this one...
    
   

A prayer for my son...

I pray you grow up knowing you are loved. Your Mom and I may not be perfect, but there is nothing we wouldn't do for you, and sacrifice for your welfare. I pray you appreciate and respect family. Aside from Christ and His church, it is the most important thing you can live for. I pray for good health for you as you continue to grow, and that you would take care of the body you have been given. I pray you are a reader. Always expand your mind, and never stop learning. Readers are leaders! I pray you are a lover of music and the arts. Whether it be music, writing, drawing, photography, painting, or acting, always stay creative, and find the beauty in everything. I pray you are a positive person, and see things through the joy that Christ affords us. I pray you will always respect and take care of your Mom. As much as I love you, there is a bond between you two that I could never duplicate. Never let circumstances in life break the love that you two have. I pray you have a heart for people who need hope. The needy, the poor, the hopeless. Be a rock for them and always give yourself for their cause. I pray you love the outdoors. God created all there is for His glory, so delight in it. Hunt, fish, play ball, hike, camp, get dirty. Enjoy creation, and always take care of it. I pray you enjoy history, and the things of the past. Appreciate good quailty craftsmenship and old relics. Talk to old men. Learn from the past. Revel in the simplicity of it all. Sometimes it's better to slow down so much that the past catches up to you. I pray you are a leader. And not just a strong-willed person that gets recognized, but lead son. Know who you are, Who's you are, and have a cause. And lead. I pray you are a true man. Learn to fix stuff, be decisive, respect women, be handy, take charge, have some common sense. You were created in God's image, and He is strong, a warrior, powerful, protective. Be a man. I pray you respect others. Always know what you believe, and stand firm in that, but respect other's viewpoints. Love conquers all. I pray you always have one definitive source for truth in everything you seek and do: Scripture. We will try to demonstrate for you the right way to live, try to model good examples for you to model your life by, try to instill good moral for you. But we are sinful, and we will fail you. Always go back to the source of truth. He will never fail you or let you down. May all you do be grounded in His Word. I pray you and I will always be friends, but that you would understand the disciplenary role that I will be forced to take sometimes. I want to be your best bud, but I have to be your Father first and foremost. But I will always be here for you to talk to. And lastly, and most importantly, I pray that the Spirit is starting to work on your heart right now, even at your young age, to prepare it to accept the good news that is the Gospel. Ultimately, it is the most important thing in life, and the most important decision you will ever make. Follow Him, and don't turn back. This is my prayer for you...

the Artist

This silence with it's calming voice beckons me in. It's here that I see clearly, without hinderance, without indulgence. Just my soul, and there, no deeper, yet deeper still, yes there, springing from the very fibers of my core is He. The Lover. The Artist. And with broad strokes He moves, weaving the tapestry of my being with the detail and prudence of a master artisan. It's here that that I am transformed. It's here in the silence that I center my thoughts. Not around and idea, for He is the origin of thought. Not around a concept, for He is source of premise. No, but it is deeper. A calming reality that cannot be fully grasped; a conscious that can only be marvelled. Thoughts, that as lofty and ambitious as they may be, still, are considered but imperceptible when compared to His nature. But nonetheless I am drawn, not by a force of haughty ambitions, but by love. A love woven in the very tapestry of my being. He created me in His image, and it is the Master that beckons me here. I am drawn as a bride to her groom, longing for such intimacy as I have never experieced. And it is from this wellspring of beauty that I delight in. It is this foundation that I am anchored in. He is the origin of all that is lovely, all that is good, all that is. He is the origin of my being, of my soul. And it is here in this silence that I am still, and delight in Him.

You are fall...

Fall is my favorite time of the year, and lately I have been soaking up the weather, the colors, smells, and sights of autumn. What a perfect time of the year to reflect, to enjoy family, blessings, and to thank God for all He has done for us. Over the past few weeks, I have jotted down a few attributes of this season, and really meditated on them. God has revealed himself in such a fresh way by me taking time to "be still, and know He is God." Naturally, (and thankfully!) poetry started flowing from my soul, and I thought I would share. I penned this in a format that I have never written in before, sort of a visual cause/spiritual effect kind of way. I hope you enjoy...

"You are fall"

The morning sun, with arms of gold                                    
Displays it's noble light,                                                            
And strretches forth with glorious beams
As victor over night.

(You are fall, Your glory shines
  Like beams for all to see,
  Over night, and sin, and death,
  You've claimed the victory)

Through soaring pines and humble fields,
Swift breezes wake the soul
Of the fingerprints of splendor,
Leaves of green, and red, and gold.

(Spirit move, awake our souls,
 And You our power be,
 Your fame and splendor, majesty,
 May through us, people see.)

Like artisans the trees they lay
Their glory all around,
A quilt of color they prepare
For winter's frozen ground.

(As God, You on the tree there hung,
 Your glory You laid down,
 A quilt of grace Your blood has made
 Propitiation found.)

Thankful

Today, I'm going to be thankful. I am going to slow down and appreciate all the blessings in my life. I am going to smile more at people. I am going to be patient with everyone. I am going to enjoy the fall leaves, and all their color. I am going to enjoy every sip of good quality coffee. I am going to relish the time that I had at breakfast with my family this morning, laughing at Tucker as he hammed it up for all the people around us. I am going to enjoy the beautiful weather, and be thankful for the rain this past week. I am going to play with my dogs. I am going to appreciate my health, and the health of my family. I am going to thank God for His goodness and mercy. I am going to read some, and be grateful for the ability to enjoy a good book. I am going to play music, and be thankful for the gift of sound and music. I'm going to enjoy family, good food and football. I am going to talk to someone about Christ today. I will slow down a little and take in the beauty of creation, and let it speak to my soul. I will take some time to think of those who have impacted my life, and remember those who have gone on to be with the Lord, and thank Him for their legacy of love. I will prepare my heart for corporate worship tomorrow, and yearn to see friends, family, and brothers and sisters in Christ eager to meet with Him there. I am going to cherish my wife, and let her know how much she means to me. I am going to sit here and appreciate the smell of a coffee shop, as the aroma fills this room. I am going to thank God for America, and the freedoms we have here. I am going to love more. I am going to serve more. I am going to live more. And I will be thankful...

truth and public squares...

I don't really know if today was any different than any other day in the news realm, but I could not help but get sucked in to the blatent overall them today on the many networks. I tend to be a news junkie. Whenever I have a few minutes during the day, I love going to various websites, radio stations, tv channels, etc. to see what's going on in this fast paced, connected, global world we live in. It's our modern day public square. It's how people all around the world get facts, read about events, and to see what current issues will affect their lives in the near future. But today seemed a little different. A little biased. A little close to home. It seemed the church, christianity, and the Lord's work (I use that term loosely and firmly at the same time for various reasons) were all woven in to the tapestry of the majority of stories  I seemed to read about. First, with the Christians in Egypt under attack from the interim government, to the Presby USA church ordination of it's controversial clergy, to the Unitarian church here in Charlotte that held a blessing service for pets (filled with "hymns" centered around glorification of animals, rock and roll, and the "clergy's" name), to the GOP debate on the calling of Mormonism "a cult  (and how it is perceived with voters), to Tim Tebow and his polarizing stance for Christ, to the Iranian pastors life in the hands of the Iranian supreme judge, it seems that everything I was reading broke my heart for what I was seeing unfold in front of my very eyes. It should not have come as such a shock I guess, but the overall rejection of truth in our "modern day public square" just reminded me of Isaiah 59, and how the Lord must look at all of this. It says, starting in verse 9: "Therefore justice is far from us, and righteousness does not overtake us; we hope for light, and behold, darkness, and for brightness, but we walk in gloom. We grope for the wall like the blind; we grope like those who have no eyes; we stumble at noon as in the twilight, among those in full vigor we are like dead men. We all growl like bears; we moan and moan like doves; we hope for justice, but there is none; for salvation, but it is far from us. For our transgressions are multiplied before you, and our sins testify against us; for our transgressions are with us, and we know our iniquities: transgressing and denying the LORD, and turning back from following our God, speaking oppression and revolt, conceiving and uttering from the heart lying words. Justice is turned back and righteousness stands far away; for truth has stumbled in the public squares, and uprightness cannot enter. Truth is lacking, and he who departs from evil makes himself a prey. The LORD saw it, and it displeased him..." Wow. I had to repent. Truth is lacking in my world, in my generation, in my heart, and it convicted me to my core. Like Isaiah had stated previously when he realized his condition in the light of God's holiness in chapter 6, I repented of being a man of "unclean lips...in the midst of a people of unclean lips." It was all laid out there all day for me to think over. And what was  most frustrating, for me at least, was the fact that the main issue was not even being discussed, but was lost in the discussion of more trivial things. Yes, the calling of Romney's faith a "cult" was being talked about, but noone ever sought the truth about the statement the entire day. It was assumed that the statement was ill-timed, politically incorrect, and ill-advised. What the issue was about all day long was if the statement would help or hurt certain candidates in the polling. Where are we at as a nation? We say this is a stupid thing to say and then we think it is a travesty for Iran to martyr a pastor for his faith? Where is the standard? Are we really going to criticize a nation for their stance all-the-while demonizing religious freedom at home? Are we really going to act like we are concerned for brothers in Egypt being killed for who they worship while at the same time being tolerant and supportive of "churches" focusing more on  animals and creation than the One True God?  My heart was so saddened at the supportive, positive, and extensive interviews with the Presby minister all day. It was heralded as a great victory for God. A step toward enlightenment for the church. A victory for mankind. What they all forgot to mention was the truth. And to hear Him say that God has been his biggest supporter for the past decade was heresy. A tainting of His name. As I read the Truth in the Scriptures, I do not see that god. He isn't in there. He is Truth, and he is holy. I think the realization that was the plumbline to the heart of the matter was this. All day long, I would venture to say maybe 3-4 hours of news coverage, with all the clergy, rabbis, pastors, media, and politicians interviewed, not once, ONCE, did I hear any scripture quoted. We are so blessed by the freedom to go to His Word for truth in everything we see, but we as a nation have turned our back on Him. Don't believe me? Go to the public squares. It's the pulse of the body that we call our society. A lot of people are searching for Him there.

success...

Today was not a good day. At least from one perspective. I have been recovering from dental surgery, and although the pain and healing process has been much better than I expected, it still has got me down a little. Work wasn't the greatest either. Sometimes things are shown to you unexpectedly that really show you where you stand with people, or with organizations, or with circumstances. And today, it seemed that things from several vantage points were all coming down on me at once. I admit, I kinda shut down a little and internalized things, (like I always do) and I think that, although maybe not the best practice, it helps me to think things through and to prioritize situations. There have been several things this past week that have made me stop, and really be intentional on how I approach them, as opposed to just flying off the cuff and rushing into things. On one hand, it really made me proud of myself that I had the wisdom to handle it like I did, because Lord knows, I didn't want to. But that is where the positive aspects ended. I guess there comes a point in a man's life when he wants to know if he is valuable. If his work really matters. If he is excelling in what he does. If he is a leader. If he is, what we call, successful. And I have learned this week, (learned in my heart, not just in my head) that it truly depends on where you are looking, and who you find success in. As I said earlier, I got off work tonight and was really down. It felt like everything I had really worked for for the past few years did not matter one bit. Nothing went right, nobody seemed to notice anything I had been doing, and that I was running on empty, and had used all my efforts and energy to end up out of gas on a dead end road. Until tonight. I really hadn't planned on it, but my brother and I went to the mall to just hang out awhile. And as usual, we found ourselves wandering aimlessly around BooksAMillion. (after a stop at Starbucks of course)  I really had nothing to buy there, but I love books, and it felt right to just see what was there. I flipped through several books, and browsed the aisles for anything that caught my attention. And then God spoke to me. Through a bible cover? It might have well have been a flashing neon billboard right there in the middle of the store. (and what was I doing looking in the Bible covers anyway...I really dont care for them personally...) Right there in front of me, on the front of the cover was Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope" (ESV)... I honestly wanted to cry right then and there...but I couldn't. Tanner was right there, and I would never hear the end of it. Anyways, I came home and went to Jeremiah, and kept reading... "Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." (vs 12-13). What a great passage, and what a greater hope. He knows our future, and He has a plan for me. I needed to hear that tonight, and His word was faithful and in perfect harmony with his will for me this week. I just have to remain faithful in what He has called me to do, no matter how small I think His plans may be. It's in Christ I find true success and in Him I find a hope and calling for my life. And I'll be the first to admit, it's hard...really really hard to trust in that sometimes. My ways are definitely not His ways, and sometimes it takes big events to chip away at my pride so I can see this. But He is faithful. I will be the first to admit it, I don't have all the answers, and I confess, that I doubt my leadership abilities more than anyone. I have a hard time looking past my failures and shortcomings, but this one thing I do know. He has a plan for me, a plan for life of hope and meaning. And He has one for you. Success.. it's not found in a job, or money, or status, or influence. It's found in Jeremiah 29: 13...when we seek Him with our whole heart...

life...

Life is funny, you know? Its not easy, it's not always a bed of roses. It's hard work. But its fun, sometimes. Nobody knows if they will have another breath, and yet they live as if they are guaranteed their life plan in full. Why? Why do we do that to ourselves? Why, after all the pain, all the confusion, all the times that we sit and think about all the times that we did not have it figured out, or even have a clue for that matter, do we put any stock in what tomorrow has. Do I believe that we should plan? Well, yes, but I think we worship our plan more than our God most of the time. He has a funny way of putting us back in place. Why do I feel like I have the biggest burden on me all the time? Have I not prayed and asked for clarity, for insight? Do I believe that God answers the prayers of His own? Do I? Then what is this burden? Is it pressure? Is it responsibility? And what is the root of it? Me. I am the root of it. Here I sit, after praying and asking Him to reveal Himself to me, and expect Him to lay out the entire rest of my life for me? Why in the world would He do that? Wouldn't that lead to a very faithless, predictable, unreliant, self-centered life for me? In this moment I am reminded what it is that was lifted up in prayer. Now, notice I said "what was lifted up in prayer", not   "what I prayed for." This is the difference. Well, the Holy Spirit is really. The difference that is. You see, while I was verbally lifting up what I think my mind needed from God, the Spirit was offering up what my soul needs. I dont need a life plan, I need Christ. I dont need to know what my family will be like in 10 years, I need to put the book down and play with my son. I dont need to read about how to be the best husband, I need to go hug my wife. God is as much apart of the small everyday things as He is is the grand scheme of this universe. I want to make a difference. I am so sick and tired of seeking where my significance in life is. Its not where it is, it's who it's through. It's how I live it. Thats what leadership is. Thats what life is. I have sat here for the last few weeks wrestling with where God wants me, and how He is going to use me. The fact is, the most important, influential thing I feel that I could have done tonight was spent on the side of a bathroom tub, investing in my son as we experienced bathtime together, investing in the future generation. I think is shifting my philosophy in a big way. What the future leaders of the church need is not answers, not premade guidelines, or prfect leadership models. While these are all great, and needed, we miss the point, we miss living life with them. We miss most of the opportunities to influence them. While we spend numerous hours sitting alone looking for ways to develope ourselves, and seeking knowledge to be able to pass on to others to "help" them, they have already got off work, went to the store to buy some more clothes, stopped by the convenience store to grab a drink, headed off to the gym, called some friends to grab some dinner, checked facebook 20 times, went to the mall, and surfed the internet 3 times...Here's what I am saying. We are not experiencing life together. You see, I remember growing up in the church, and being discipled the exact same way. One hour or two a week meeting somewhere, most of the time at church, and talking about leadership, christian principles, discipleship, spiritual maturity, etc...It was great, it was refreshing, it was...not practical. When I left there, I had a life to live. Mostly outside of that community with no support from the church. I would go to school where liberal professors immediately discredited what I had learned in church. I went off with classmates who wouldn't know what to do with a Bible if it hit them in the face. I went to see movies that glorified everything my morals were against. I went to check emails and was enticed 5-6 times during that 10 minute span to offer my soul to fleshly desires. I went to the mall, where everything was based on superficial desires and pride. I had to go to work, where conversations, attitudes, and lifesyles were not expected to live up to any expectations I had set for myself. And such was life. I am glad I had a supporting community of believers every weekend that I could come worship with, but where was everyone when I was living life? You know, the everyday, real things, real problems, and real temptations that come up. Its not all a bed of roses. Even if I was in a spiritual war, I wouldnt even know it by the lack of an army around me. I had the doctrine down, I had the right answers, but every time I stepped out into the world, out of the deep caves of religion that we all resort to for spiritual amnesty, I was getting my teeth knocked out. Why worry about tomorrow when life is blitzing me now, right? We have to stop worrying about the future and start investing in people right now. Life is too short, and too important to waste all your time developing some cookie cutter life 101 for dummies sunday school discipleship mumbo jumbo, and then not developing community with anyone throughout the week. While we are preparing our hearts, they are getting theirs ripped by pornography, unhealthy relationships, language, pride, drugs, etc...How shameful I am that the only time I have invested in the future generation on a practical basis is once a year at Disciple Now. Really? We tell these kids that they are so important that we will open our homes and life to them...for one weekend?  How useless of a leadership model is that? I tell my family how much I love them, but focus so much of my creative and practical energy on my career, and personal development that I do not spend the time with them like I should. I tell people all the time "ill call you" or "well get together soon" with no intention of actually doing it. It sounds good, and it feeds our self-centeredness, as we do just enough to sound like we want to invest in others, but actually inside, do not have any desire to give them one more minute of "our time" ..."Our time"...you know, the time that we do not have any sovereignty over, and the thing that we are not guaranteed one more second of. As I have studied this week, we cannot promise them happiness and prosperity, but what we can lead them to is joy, and a true hope in Christ. Living life. Together.

Numbers 14

Numbers 14

Oh that my heart would strive to see

The timing of your will for me

May only by your spirit I

In humble adoration be

Distortion caused by skies of blue

Of verity and truth of You

Will lead me to that hill forlorn

The bulwark of your name withdrew

For by Your Law I will accede

Not by my pride, or selfish greed

Like sons of Nun my life reflect

And only let Your presence lead

Based on sermon titled "The other side of God's will" by Mike Daniels  8/24/11

invisible man...

Tonight, I picked up several books that I haven't read for awhile and skimmed through them. Some fiction, some poetry and prose, some self-help, etc...I find that every once in awhile, changing the format and cycle of your reading habits is very helpful and healthy. I tend to read deep, theological, very mind-intensive books, and while this is a good thing, sometimes God can use the strangest and simplest things to speak to you. Like tonight. I was reading "Invisible Man" by Ralph Ellison. Through the lens of black existentialism, overcoming oppresion, and finding hope, it is a well written book with a great story. At one point in the story, the narrator is having a conversation with a character named Barrelhouse, and a certain portion of the text just jumped out at me and really got my attention:

"Times are hard everywhere. But what's been going on up here, Barrel?"
"Oh you know how it is, Brother; things are tight and lots of folks...got...lost...You know how it goes."
"You mean people in our organization?"
"Quite a few of them are. Fellows like Brother Maceo."
"But why? They were doing all right."
"Sure they was-as long as you people was fighting for 'em. But the minute y'all stopped, they started throwing folks out on the street."

Such is life, right? We're fine when everyones together, when we have each other's back. When we have someone fighting for us, on our side. It brings hope, its instills confidence. It is the reason that Christ is the only true peace and hope there is. Because we all do it at one time or another. Abandon a friend, desert a loved one in need. We let someone down, and the world throws them out on the street. They get lost. To quote Barrelhouse, "You know how it goes." Really? Thats it? That's just the way it is, and we are supposed to act like it's a normal expected, everyday thing? Why? Because we put our hopes in things that will let us down everytime for sake of convenience. For false security. For acceptance. But we get thrown out every time. First of all, as a body of believers in Christ, we should take this to heart and never stop fighting for each other. Or any human being for that matter. They are souls that need love, and if we don't show them Truth and true love, aren't we the ones really throwing them out on the street? And secondly, what do we do when we find ourselves cold and lonely, thrown out, and alone on the street corner? Is God still there? Why is He so distant? Why is this happening? I'll end with a piece of poetry I came across tonight. From Bradley Hathaway. Who is he? I dont know. Some skater-punk looking kid that needs a haircut. But his heart is the same as every man, woman, or child that has ever walked this earth. Searching. Listen to this...

"Silence"

What's happening here?

I was once alive
      and

      now
I'm so full of dread
And almost dead

Show me your wounded head
That has led
To communion
with the Father

But WHERE
did He go?

His presence seems
Farther
and
Farther
away
each
day

But I'm trying so hard
to steer His way
yet still lonely
and confused
on this
COLD
HARD
GROUND
I LAY

Speak to me with wise mouth and say

"It's all good, kid
It's nothing that YOU did
and though it feels like
I'm not with you right NOW
JUST BE STILL
and listen
for that
sound..."


(did you hear it?)

Listen again.

DID YOU HEAR IT?

That silent voice that just spoke nothing?

THAT is ME!

I'm listening to your plea
with open ears
COUNTING ALL YOUR TEARS
Flowing from your
irritated eyes
SEARCHING the skies.
LOOKING FOR THAT
       HOPE
that beyong there lies.
You yound worrisome sparrow,

        FIND REST

Lay your TATTERED
HEAD upon my
omnipotent breast
and make it
your nest.

no STRONG
  COLD
    WIND

Could ever blow
and carry you
from this
your home.

LOOK AROUND
  SEE THE LIFE
Springing up from the ground?
Spring colors springing forth
       in celebration
       of your trusting

It's a constant PROCESS
             this is

GROWING you into the person
          you are to become

And when you sense the setting of the sun
Know that it's only rising and has just begun.

            NOW GO FORTH

               Sing songs
                 of faith!

Lift up others in the midst of this race
     And if you CANT keep the pace
      or lose sight of my face

Know that I'm always near so you NEED NOT FEAR.
    (but don't worry all of them or that right now.)

                 Just sit here
          and enjoy the peace I have to offer
            in My silence.

        When I am silent
         I am listening.

     and not abandoning.





I loved it. And my heart needed this tonight. I hope this spoke to yours as well...keep fighting for one another. Keep the faith. Love one another. Times are hard everywhere...

truth, values, and influencing society (and such)

"Christian values...cannot be accepted as a superior utilitarianism, just as a means to an end. The biblical message is truth and it demands a commitment to truth. It means that everything is not the result of the impersonal plus time plus chance, but that there is an infinite-personal God who is the Creator of the universe, the space-time continuum. We should not forget that this was what the founders of modern science built upon. it means the acceptance of Christ as Savior and Lord, and it means living under God's revelation. Here there are morals, values, and meaning, including meaning for people, which are not just a result of statistical averages. This is neither a utilitarianism, nor a leap away from reason; it is the truth that gives a unity to all of knowledge and all of life. This...means that individuals come to this place where they have this base, and they influence the consensus. Such Christians do not need to be a majority in order for this influence on society to occur." -Francis Schaeffer in How Should We Then Live, The Rise and Decline of Western Thought and Culture...Very well said, and very refreshing in this modern liberal, everything goes, hopeless, no meaning to life, quantitative, measurable, faithless society we live in. We are not here by chance, and that should make us grateful. He is reason, He is truth. And we have been blessed with values and morals to live by. Many times people believe that standards, values, and guidelines are put in place to discipline us, to put us in our place, and to keep us humble. This may have some truth to it, but it is not the entire picture. Without reason, without God's revelation, without His truth and holiness, and high standards, we are hopeless, wandering this earth by chance, on our own, to live to whatever truth we deem relevant at that chosen time. But here we sit pursued by a passionate God who desires us. Desires our hearts, our minds, our service. We can resist His truth and values, choosing to live our life as another meaningless statistic. Or we can embrace His holiness and change the world...

service...

Some things in life just hit you harder than others. Many things you see and hear about on a daily basis can suddenly become more significant when God puts you through situations. I guess you can call it the refiners fire, or maybe using the situation as a lens, to put things in focus. However you want to look at it, when He puts a burden on your heart, it's unmistakeable. Like last week. God had been working through many different things to show me that I need to be burdened about something. Not burdened down with guilt, or shame, or the like. A holy discontent. Something that gave me passion. And vision. Needless to say, it had been awhile since I had even prayed about this. Complacency had set it. God had been faithful, and I had gotten comfortable in Him. Until Tuesday night. Thats when Tucker spiked a 104+ fever, and had a seizure. A terrifying moment, a frantic car ride, panic, E.R., hospital, tests, probes, sleepless nights, scary thoughts...and a burden? It didn't seem right. My son needed me, my wife needed me, and here I was walking the Hemby Childrens Hospital floor late this one night, and God showed me things through His lens. Surely He did not do all of this to bring me to this moment. Surley not, but, who am I to know His ways? The peace that came over me was much needed, but confusing. Tucker was not out of the woods yet, and here I sit wondering if all this was to get a hold of me. But nevertheless I was there. Stuck. For days. And nights. With God. And people all around me that were hurting alot more than any of us were. Kids battling cancer, toddlers walking down the hall hooked to who knows what. Children who were paralyzed from the neck down. Parents who looked like they had no hope. Nurses and doctors who had developed an emotional immunity to peoples hurt to cope with the reality of doing their jobs. And this is just one wing, of one floor, of one hospital, in one city, in one state, in one country. People need hope. People need compassion. People just need someone to just be there. Where have I been? My pompous position of "life's all about choices" and "there's consequences for every action" had left my heart cold to the needs of others. Its not as black and white as I had seen it. People hurt, and sometimes there is no good explanation for the situation. God bestowed mercy and grace upon me in my time of need, who am I to decide who to give it to? And so my burden became real. Service. To others, for others. Being there for people in time of need. They say time is precious, and it's true. But time is a gift from God that does not cost us a thing, and only becomes valuable when you give yours up for someone. Serving others with the time God has given me is the last thing my flesh wants to do, but the absolute best thing for my pride and humility. As I went back to the hospital room to put Tucker back to sleep, these thoughts were put on the backburner of my mind. As I sat there holding my son against my chest, hearing his soft breath over the hum of the air vents, I was relishing the moment that I had right then and there to spend with him. And on the far side of the room, the light was coming through the hallway window, illuminating the entire room with unwanted light, and reflecting off something that caught my eye. It was my watch. Reminding me that God has given me this time to be the person He wants me to be. A father. A husband. A servant to all.

hope...

Tonight, I was cruising down 485 thinking about the path that God has taken us down to get us here. As I thought about the past few months, and the week ahead of us, I felt so blessed and privileged to be a child of God. The tears in the bad times, the laughter in the good times, He's been there with us through them all. Who am I do doubt His ways, or to try to question His will? All I can do is honor Him with what He has blessed me and my family with. I was also thankful for such an amazing church. This morning, everything that has been inside of my head all week was put to rest, taken care of by the peace that Christ, and the worship of Him, can bring. Pastor Clint ended his "Hope" series today with an unbelievable sermon on putting your life in focus, and how we need to center our hope, direction, and goals on Christ, not our fleshly desires. In Sunday school, David Wade talked on getting our life, our house, our prayer life, and our career in order. It could not have been a more perfectly timed lesson for me, as I have been struggling with some real life issues in a few of these areas. It was like I had been praying all week for God's help in some key areas in my life, and after worship, He providentially spoke to me through these great men of God. Now I dont have it all together. As I prayed going down the road, Christ revealed, through the lens of His holiness and redemption, how much of a train-wreck I can still be. But I have hope finally. And that hope is not found in my strength, abilities, action, or leadership. My hope, my future, my sanctification, my all...is found in Christ alone.

faith and hope...

"God takes pleasure when His children participate in His purposes"

What an incredible journey I've been on lately. Tucker is growing like a weed, and it is so much fun to see him learn new things, and develop into or "little man." He is such a blessing, and I cannot wait to see what God has in store in our future with him! And between him and our jobs, Julie and I have had quite a time trying to juggle what time we do have around. This past weekend, a huge burden was lifted off me, as we traded in my truck for a new SUV. As some of you know, mechanical problems with the truck had just about drove me to the nuthouse, and constantly worrying about travel safety for Julie and Tucker on the road was always bogging me down. We were so blessed to find a good deal on the Explorer, and after much prayer and guidance, we feel we made a wise decision in purchasing it... On another note, we are so glad that winter is almost over, and already signs of spring are starting to show here in Tennessee. And even though I am not looking forward to cutting grass all the time, having warmer weather is definitely a plus to take Tucker out in, and spend more time outdoors. It will be awesome taking him to the park, and walking him down to the pond, and to see him starting to explore! God has definitely been good to us, and we look forward to seeing what he has in store for us this spring.

On a more personal note, the subjects of faith and hope are definitely being revealed to me in great ways. The majority has been shown to me in Steven Furticks book, "Sun Stand Still." I have loved reading it, and much of what he speaks about is exactly what God has been stirring in my heart lately. I loved the verses he pointed out in he most recent chapter I read..."Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead" -James 2:17; and "Faith is the SUBSTANCE of things hoped for, the EVIDENCE of things not seen." -Hebrews 11:1. Such well known, Bible 101 type verses, yet so many times, not fully comprehended. My life has been so full of hope, yet so lacking faith. Alot of times, we pray for guidance, miracles, and mountains to move, yet we want to sit on the sidelines and expect Him to play the game for us. We cannot expect great things in our lives if we are not willing to first be obedient and put some effort in the equation. The great thing is, not that God needs our help, but that He desires it. He has big plans for me, and in this I have hope. He has empowered me by His spirit to accomplish great things, and in this I have faith. And I choose to not stand around, but to walk by it...

a new page...

Alot has been happening in the Long family since my last blog! Wow, almost a month since the last one. Christmas, New Years, my birthday, and life in general has been a blur the last month, and I'm kinda glad that life is returning to normal. We have had alot of snow, between Christmas in Charlotte, and a few good storms here in TN. The last snow was piled about 3ft on our deck, with the drifts. Being a Carolina boy, this has taken alot to get used to. At first, I was trying to enjoy it as much as possible, but it has finally wore me down, and I am really looking forward to spring. Ok, enough about the weather.     .;/i908mkobhj m vg ...haha, this is Tucker's addition to the blog, I think it says "hi guys!" Ok, enough banging on the laptop for him... This past week, Julie and I have started a new diet, and we love it! It's the "17 day diet" and it has really motivated us to take better care of ourselves, physically, as well as spiritually. We have loved setting goals, getting in a routine, and feeling better. It's amazing how just adjusting your diet, and adjusting your daily habits, can make you feel so much better, give you energy, and jumpstart a new you. I think this is more than just a typical "New Years resolution." From cleaning out all the junk food, and going through and throwing out all the unnecessary crap in the fridge and pantry, to having it look like a farmers market, it feels so good to finally live to our potential. For my birthday, I got an xbox, and we have loved doing the kinect fitness every night, as it gives us quality time together, and really is a great thing we can do as a couple to motivate and support each other as we strive to live healthier lives. From Mt. Dew to green tea, McDonalds to broiled fish and steamed veggies, and brownies to yogurt, it has opened our eyes to a more organic and simple way to live. I've even started to help Julie cook the meals, and I am loving it. (still have to work on my patience, but I'm making baby steps)  It's just a conscious effort we are making to spend more quality time together, and not just lounge on the couch and watch tv. (Julie is even going through some books with me!) Anyways, all this has defined the new page in our lives. To take better care of ourselves, to set goals, to be more organized, to be better with our finances, to always strive to learn new things, to push ourselves, to grow in our marriage, to glorify God. As Tucker grows older, and we grow with him as parents, we are excited about the opportunities and blessings that God gives to us each new day. It is my prayer that we set a worthy example of how we are to live in Christ, and by His Spirit.